Digression

A question was posed "What is the difference bettween 'In a Relationship' and 'In an Open Relationship'?" I found that question interesting on many levels.

I am in college, going on my 5th year of my 4 year degree thank you. During this time I have not had any complicating relationships and I have been able to focus on myself and it has been nice. So I may not be an expert in the field of defining relationship(s) but that won't stop me from giving it my two cents.

I did some research, like the English Litr nerd that I am, and found some "definitions" for Open Relationship. Here is one of the more interesting ones:

open relationship
A relationship in which two people agree that they want to be together, but can't exactly promise that they won't see other people too. Basically, to have it all: a significant other and the freedom to hook up with other people. Common during college for many post-high school relationships.
"Are you still with Joe?" "Well, we're in a open relationship now. And it's don't ask, don't tell." "Are you okay with that?" "You know, it IS college, and there are so many cute guys out there..." ----UrbanDictionary.com

I'm sorry, but that is just... not right. I am not trying to judge anyone who may be ALL FOR an "open relationship" but I find that someone who settles for such an agreement is selling themselves short. In my limited experience and from observing those in successful relationships, I feel one of the most important facets of any relationship is for each member to feel as though they must always try to make the other as happy as they are making them. It is a two way road. The road's name: COMMUNICATION. If there is a lack of that, then all else crumbles. That is from personal experience.

According to the aforementioned definition of the term, to me it sounds like a cop-out. The one who introduces the idea is someone who is basically unwiling to invest completely in the relationship out of fear that they may be missing something better if it came along and if the current relationship didn't work out, they'd have no one. :: sniff sniff:: Is there a bull near by??????

The entire thing of any relationship is living and learning from it. If it doesn't work out, suck it up and get back on the rails.

The heart is an amazing thing. It has the ability to pump enough blood through the entire body for 70-80 years with minor difficulty. If taken care of, it can recuperate from even the worst of attacks. With excersice and exursion it can be one of the strongest muscles in the human body. And no, it can't break.

The figurative heart is the same. It is trampled on, it is shattered, abused, ridiculed, ignored, mistreated, worn on the sleeve, etc. But it needs to be exercised. It needs to learn how to build up. It needs to learn how to put itself back together again.

An open relationship, when failed, hurts the same but with no-one to blame. If there is anything we learn in life is that when there is noone to blame, we blame ourselves. Wouldn't it be better to take responsibility knowingly and with maturity rather than throw your hands back and say "We were in an open relationship. It wasn't that serious anyway."

That is a cop out.

Why would anyone want to sell themselves short by making themselves "not that serious" when they are investing what we hold so dear- our hearts.

If I give my heart to someone, I want to make sure that they realize it is not something to be mistreated, trampled, abused, ignored... And it is my most sincere intention to treat theirs as I would have mine.

That is my short rant. You may or may not agree with me and I guess that is everyone's inalienable right.